Communicate With Confidence!®: Booher Banter

The Power of Summary

Summarize Seriously. Doesn’t quite have the ring of the romantic movie Love Actually, does it? But that shouldn’t tempt you to trivialize the issue that surfaced yesterday in a roomful of investors willing to plunk down anywhere from $5-100 million on some entrepreneurial business that interested them.

“Remember the 10-minute time limit for each presenting company,” the moderator of the event explained to the group of 22 hopeful CEOs prepared to win his or her share of the available funds. "We’ve hosted this event for several years. And the feedback from these investors seated around you is that they make up their minds in the first 3-4 minutes whether they’re interested or not. So the ten minutes we’ve allotted to tell your story is quite adequate.”

He paused to let the point sink in. There as a corporate advisor to my client, I nodded my “I told you so” to the team. Roger that. They were locked and loaded, ready for launch.

Evidently, many others were not.

Executive after executive of these small businesses stepped to the microphone and stumbled and stuttered their way through 4-6 minutes of their allotted ten before being able to clearly state what it is their company does. Many tried to start with how they got into the business. Some started by introducing their management team (important, of course, for a group of investors—but not for 3 minutes!). Some rambled on about how they came up with their logo, packaging design, recipe, or facilities. Several talked about differentiation. A few talked about how they’d tested their product—clinical data and analysis.

Only a handful—make that a newborn’s fist—summarized upfront ALL the key elements about their business that a group of investors would want to know.

Yet, I bet if you asked any one of these busy executives back on the job how important the ability to summarize is, they’d launch into a sermon about some pet peeve such as these:

long disorganized voice mails their employees or prospects leave for them

meetings where someone can’t articulate a clear idea succinctly

emails that include far too much detail

reports that read like a novel rather than a status/project update

So to develop the ability to summarize massive amounts of information well, seek out some good models. For starters, I suggest The Wall Street Journal’s “What’s News?” column.

(Readers, if you have other suggestions for great summarizers out there, please feel free to share them here.)

Do You Get a Kick Out of Keynotes? Communicate with Confidence®

If you’re on the hearing end of a presentation, you may think it all looks effortless—the speaker flows with polished pearls of wisdom, parades across the platform with boundless energy, interacts spontaneously with the audience with great wit, responds to challenging questions with authority, and sways skeptics with genuine personal warmth.

But to put it in the common vernacular:  “Ain’t necessarily so.”

Yesterday, I delivered a keynote for 600 CEOs of small businesses and senior executives of large corporations on one of my typical communication topics.   Since it was one of those rare local events (as opposed to having to jump on an airplane), I’d dashed into the office to link up with four of our staff members, who were accompanying me to the convention center to staff the book table where I’d be autographing books after my session. 

Running about ten minutes later than I’d planned, I suppose I looked a little tense.  On the way out the door, Candy, our production manager, asked a question I’d not thought about in awhile:  “Do you still get nervous?”   

“Sure.  Always.”  I nodded.  Even after more than 20 years on the platform, I still get nervous. 

How nervous?  It just depends on the stakes.   What do I have to gain—or lose—by the keynote or business presentation?  What’s the potential contract worth?   How many potential new clients are sitting in the audience?   Is there another business opportunity hanging in the balance?  What’s the dollar value on that opportunity?  What’s new and different about this keynote—or is just the same ole’ same ole’?

Some of these same issues may flood your mind when you stand up to make business or technical presentation to a boss or prospect or deliver a keynote for your industry meeting.  What do you stand to gain or lose?  What are the differences between those sit-down-around-the-conference-table-conversations and those larger presentations?  How can you become more comfortable in the latter?

During the two-hour program and the two-hour networking event that followed yesterday, here are some of the comments that attendees shared with me:

• “You know, I don’t mind talking in a small group. I’m fine there. But put me up on stage like you were today, and I’m very uncomfortable. I always tell my pastor-father, ‘it’s just not my gift.’”
• “I’m the sportscaster on a local Fox affiliate. I’ve never thought about some of those things. I made notes as I watched. I’m doing a speech tomorrow myself, and I need to be aware of the differences. It’ll make a huge difference.”
• “I always have to have a script and stand behind a podium. Always. As VP, I emcee events and introduce speakers. And we sponsor events like this all the time, where we ‘say a few words.’ But I’m just uncomfortable.”

To these people and all of you out there, here are three pointers that may help you get a kick out of keynotes—delivering, not just listening:

Understand your audience. Nothing gives you more confidence and helps you prepare better than talking to audience members beforehand. Ask them a few questions: What do you want to know about X? What are your biggest challenges in the area of X? What were you hoping I could help you with (or provide more information about)? Tell me a little more about your work—give me a “week-in-the-life-of” overview of your work. And, of course, you’ll want to ask these questions before you arrive on the scene so you have time to prepare to address these issues in your presentation or keynote.

Make your keynote both a conversation and a performance: That is, select a few people randomly in different parts of the audience and direct your comments to them. Make eye contact with them. Gesture toward them. Walk in their direction. (Everyone around them will think you’re looking at them as well.) The “conversation” mindset will relax you. But remember that you’re also delivering a performance; for that, you need energy and polished prose.

Be prepared. “Winging it” is for the birds. Nothing adds to your confidence like knowing exactly what you’re going to say—concisely, clearly, cleverly.

Keynotes can be a real kick if you feel confident. If not prepared, you’re going to want to kick yourself in the seat of the pants the day of the event.

Do we have some success stories out there? Let us hear about them.

Communication: Intentional Improvement?

Have you ever lain awake at night—almost all night—and replayed a conversation in your head over and over and over and over? For a long while, I thought I was the only one who did that. Then I heard other women admit they did it, too. Then yesterday I heard a male doctor friend of mine admit the habit to a group of colleagues.

You hear the entire exchange in instant replay—but not exactly. Your part of the dialogue changes.  You redraft your responses. They get better, wiser, funnier, more cavalier, spontaneous, more patient, firmer, less aggressive, more resigned. Finally, they’re tuned to perfection. Then you ache for the opportunity to redo the dialogue in real life.

Most of the time that second chance never comes around—at least, not in exactly the same circumstance with the same person. But that doesn’t mean the all-nighter wasn’t worth the thought. Why?

The basic business act of 2008 is communicating. Search on the single word communication and Google will turn up 320,000,000 results. In the workplace alone, your success at almost any endeavor correlates to your ability to communicate well, so you—and I—need all the practice we can get.

In leafing through the March issue of Communication Briefings: Ideas That Work, a publication devoted to workplace communication, for example, we learn to

survive a “pile it on” boss and leave the office with a focused list of priorities

improve relationships while negotiating

give “full-circle” feedback

deliver more persuasive presentations

show more empathetic responses as we listen

avoid bull-dozer tendencies when leading

end a customer or client conversation

lead a team to listen to each other more effectively

keep better meeting notes

create more engaging copy for a website

make better use of time on the phone

neutralize win-lose discussions without breaking relationships

criticize to some effect

persuade others to change their behavior

polish a professional image

receive honest feedback

introduce change and make it palatable

deliver bad news with hope that bolsters morale

Communication—all of it. Unless you climb poles to repair power lines or toss pizza all day, it’s difficult to think of doing many jobs that don’t require core communication skills. Communicate well and you can master a job, influence a team, persuade a boss, win a client, build a business, create wealth, serve humankind, and move from success to significance.

Communicate poorly and your life fills with stress and unresolved problems just as surely as if you tried to patch a flat tire with bubble gum.

Make improvement intentional. With every conversation, every meeting, every presentation, analyze and evaluate: Ask yourself: What went wrong? What went well? Why? What could or should I have said differently? What is the communication lesson learned?

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The Power of Self-Effacing Comments in a Self-Promotion Culture

Those of you who read my blog regularly know that I try to stay clear of politics in these posts—except as candidates or issues themselves illustrate communication issues. Here’s one of a handful posted in the last year that meet that criteria—above the fray, illustrative, inspiring.

While watching an interview with presidential candidate John McCain last week, I was struck with the power of self-effacing comments to 1) make someone likeable 2) stem the tide of opposition 3) have “underdog” appeal and 4) engender trust in someone’s integrity.

The talk-show host commented to Senator McCain, “In the Vietnam war, you were a real hero. I didn’t learn until recently that the VietCong offered to release you to come home because you were the son of the Admiral but that you refused because your comrades wouldn’t be released as well. Is that true?”

McCain brushed aside the comment, obviously meant as a compliment to his character, with a nod and a little humor. “Unfortunately, I didn’t know the war would last a few more years at that point.”

Later the interviewer commented on his physical pain in having both his arms broken and the lack of medical attention for his other injuries, saying he himself [the interviewer] could not have endured such suffering. McCain’s response: “Sure you could. Anybody would do the same thing in the same situation. You love America. Many have given sacrifices far greater than I.”

When asked about the little known fact of his two sons serving in Iraq and his sacrifice and commitment to America as a parent, McCain responded, “I’d prefer not to discuss my sons and have always tried to leave my sons out of it.”

When baited with the subject of Pastor Jeremiah Wright’s comments and the link to Barack Obama, the interviewer gave him every opening to cast doubt on the character, values, and judgment of his opponent in the presidential race and tout his own better judgment. Instead, McCain replied, “You can’t blame others for comments made by supporters who endorse them. Just because they agree with you doesn’t mean you agree with them. I know Obama personally and believe he’s a loyal American.”

Politics is not the only playground for promotion. Everyday we encounter websites, radio and TV ads, résumés, sales pitches, and project plans that scream…

....the leading provider of X....

....the world’s number one Y....

....the only one on the market that....

....the first and only....

....has given more to charity than....

....one of the world’s foremost authorities....

....the city’s most prominent philanthropist....

In a world where everyone is blowing their own horn, it’s occasionally refreshing to hear modesty about accomplishments, sacrifice, charity, and even goodwill for opponents. Am I alone out there in thinking the world could use a little more humility?

Obama Drama: His Communication Style Under the Microscope

Okay, I can’t remain silent any longer about the Obama craze. Every media pundit you turn to is analyzing, forecasting, mimicking, or scratching their heads about this junior senator from Illinois. What is it about his communication style that causes 20,000 people to turn out to hear him as if he were a rock star when they’ve never cared about politics before?

Sure enough, on my radio interview yesterday with The Entrepreneurial Moment, http://www.preciseselling.com/Radio.htm, we weren’t ten minutes into the show when the inevitable question surfaced from host Brian Sullivan: “So can you comment on Obama’s style—what is it that makes him so charismatic as a speaker? Let’s hear your analysis when we come back after the break?”

That was the teaser. So I had 60-seconds to think about it. Sure, as a communication specialist, I’ve watched all the presidential hopefuls over the last several months and analyzed their strengths and weaknesses during more debates than most. But typically when I’m doing press interviews, they expect me to spit out a 20-second sound-bite. Here was a talk-show host giving me the freedom of about five minutes to elaborate on Obama’s style—and with 60 seconds to think about it.

So I decided that I’d just pass my analysis on to you. Here’s what I’ve called Obama’s 5 S’s of Speaking Style:

Smile: It’s hard not to be attracted to someone’s smiling. (Most people are surprised to discover how dour they look all too often when speaking—especially when tense and especially when presenting on sensitive subjects. Cameras also have a way of emphasizing negative facial expressions.)

Stature: He’s tall. How many times have you heard someone comment on candidates who “look presidential?” Survey after survey shows that tall people are thought to be smarter, more attractive, more capable, and more successful than shorter people. Tall people command attention more quickly than short people; it’s just a fact of life. (As someone who’s only 5’4” myself, I'd like to know if anyone out there has a supplement for this condition.)

Smooth Gestures and Movement: (This learned skill is the next best thing if you can’t change your height.) He walks purposefully and gestures with large graceful movements. None of those short, chop-through-the-air John Kerry gestures we saw in 2004. You know the kind I’m referring to—those when your mother wagged her finger in your face and said, “Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you not to leave your bike in the driveway?” Obama’s hands and arms have the opposite effect—open, warm, inviting, inclusive.

Syntax: His speech is fluid. He thinks well on his feet. No rambling. Few word fillers.

Soothing Words: His word choices are uplifting. He likes to focus on positive word choices. He prefers to talk about “change” rather than “problems,” about “solutions” rather than “the mess we’re in.” Audiences walk away with “hope” rather than a “we’re heading toward doom” feeling.

This year’s race is one of the most exciting in many years—if for nothing else than to see a contrast in communication styles and how the public reacts from day to day as the candidates shape, reshape, and measure the responses to their message. As the great philosopher Yogi Berra once said, “You can observe a lot just by watching.”

Lincoln and the Language of Leadership: Precise, Powerful, Poignant

On this President's Day, I thought it might be a good idea to reflect on possibly one of the most often quoted speeches in history:  The Gettysburg Address.  As you read it, notice the power of the simple language.  Of the 278 words, 203 are only one syllable.

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate—we can not consecrate—we can not hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

The next time you write an email or a report, remember the power of precise, simple language to produce results.

(For more communication principles Abraham Lincoln practiced and preached, I highly recommend Dr. Gene Griessman's Lincoln on Communication (60-minute DVD).  Dr. Griessman has performed his one-man play in the Georgia Dome before an audience of 30,000, as well as before audiences around the world.  Click here to order your copy.  You may also want to visit Dr. Gene Griessman's site for more information about his performances.

Spin-Off From Super Tuesday: What Can You Learn About Telling Your Own Story?

Everybody spins.  I’m not knocking it.  If we didn’t spin, we’d never get a date, a mate, an employee, a job, or a contract. Spin is putting the putting the best face on things.

And that’s just what the presidential contenders did late Tuesday evening and Wednesday, coming off the grueling campaign trail to hear the voters’ feedback in 24 states.

Here’s what they each had to say about the SAME set of data diced and dissected by the pundits on every issue:

McCain: “We’ve won some of the biggest states in the country.  We have won primaries in the west, the south, the Midwest, and the north-east. And although I’ve never minded the role of the underdog, and have relished as much as anyone come from behind wins, tonight I think we must get used to the idea that we are the Republican Party front-runner….”

Romney: “I think there are some people who thought it was all going to be done tonight, but it’s not all done tonight. We’re going to keep on battling. We’re going to go all the way to the convention, we’re going to win this thing, and we’re going to get in to the White House.”

Huckabee: “You know, over the past few days a lot of people have been trying to say that this is a two-man race.  Well, you know what?  It is. And we’re in it!”

Clinton: “Together, we’re going to take back America, because I see an America where our economy works for everyone, not just those at the top, where prosperity is shared and we create good jobs that stay right here in America…. The race will drag on for weeks longer:  this is not going to be decided any time in the near future as far as we can see.”

Obama: “There is one thing on this February night that we do need the final results to know:  Our time has come. Our movement is real.  And change is coming to America.”

Raphael Sonenshein, Professor of Politics at California State University, Fullerton:  “Both Clinton and Obama had a great day, but given the expectation of momentum, the Hillary camp has slightly more reason to be happy.”

Bill Whalen, Hoover Institution:  “It’s a bad night to be Mitt Romney…He doesn’t have a signature win and he really needed California, and it didn’t come through.  It appears John McCain pretty much has the nomination sown up, but he needs to find a way to generate enthusiasm.

Huffington Post:  “For all of their pandering to ‘conservatives’ and ‘evangelicals’ John McCain and Mitt Romney have been unable to shake off Mike Huckabee. Huckabee’s victories in Alabama, Arkansas, West Virginia, and strong showings in Georgia and Missouri prove that his message resonates with voters in southern states and rural districts across the country.  Huckabee has the cache with these voters that McCain and Romney have desperately sought to develop.”

Let me repeat here:  All the above candidates and pundits are dealing with the same election results!  So as Yoggi Berra put it, “You can observe a lot by just watching.”  Make that listening, in this case.  And many of us listened until the wee-hours Tuesday evening.

So what did the candidates’ Super Tuesday demonstrate that might be useful next week on your own super Tuesday at work?

When you deliver a presentation, the facts rarely speak for themselves.  That’s why you’re making the presentation “live” rather than just emailing slides to someone.  Interpret.  What’s your point?  Tell your story.  What do the numbers mean?  What are the numbers NOT saying?  Where are the gaps?  What can the numbers NOT justify? Where’s the opportunity? What will the listeners miss in the numbers if they’re not particularly astute?

Spin away—that’s your purpose.  Appropriate spin is grounded in reality, not misleading, and provides straight answers to direct questions.  If it also happens to serve the good intentions of the speaker, so be it.

Spin away—that’s your provocative and often your path to success.

Communicate with Confidence!®:  Booher Banter is now on our homepage.  Find us at www.booher.com/booherbanter.

Bush’s State-of-the-Union Speech: An Analysis

Political pundits will be analyzing the President’s State-of-the-Union speech today as to length, applause, and flavor.  But politics aside, my interest as a communication consultant runs to the hows and whys rather than the whats.  Not what were the programs, policies, and people mentioned, but how did he shape his message, how did he phrase this or that reference to make it memorable, why did he include X or omit Y.

For starters, let’s just say the speech didn’t win any ribbons, ranking up there with his top three:  his 9-11 speech, his axis-of-evil speech, or his second inaugural speech that laid out the vision for his second term.  This one lacked a theme.  It sounded more like a list of talking points organized around issues or problems—those solved, those partially solved, and those set before Congress to be solved.

One exception:  When he got to the bullet point about terrorism, he contrasted “images that have inspired us” with “images that have sobered us.”  Had each of his “problem/issues” bullet points had such an organizational theme or structure, the speech would have been more than a briefing.

But that’s not to say that the several speechwriters’ handiwork didn’t show through here and there.  Alliterative phrases were laced throughout:
—“In this election year, let’s show them [the world] we can compete for votes and cooperate for results.”
—Judges should rule “by the letter of the law, not the whim of the gavel.”
—“decades of dictatorship” (speaking of Iraq)
—“calling of our conscious” (referring to genocide in Sudan)

The best line in the speech proved to be his comment regarding his intention not to let the current tax cuts expire.  “Some have said they don’t mind paying higher taxes. I welcome their enthusiasm.  The IRS accepts both checks and money orders.”  The line met hearty laughter from both sides of the aisle.

Finally, a speech is as much about the man as the message—about delivery as well as content.  Bush delivers the tough-guy lines best, “I’ll veto it.”  He delivers the straight lines like he’s chopping wood, slinging ax against tree stump time after time, sometimes hitting the precise target, and sometimes having the ax head bounce to the side just a little short or long of the targeted pause. 

And he looks equally relieved when he’s finished.

Hard Crowd? Humor Helps

Ten GOP hopefuls squared off in last night's debate when they faced 90 minutes of tough questions from three seasoned reporters. So what got excerpted and aired today on the morning talk shows? All the humorous one-liners. Former Arkansas Governor Huckabee's comment: "We've had a Congress that's spent money like John Edwards at a beauty shop." Senator McCain's line on Republicans losing the 2006 election: "We lost it because we in the Republican Party came to Washington to change government, and government changed us....  We spent money like a drunken sailor, although I never knew a sailor, drunk or sober, with the imagination of my colleagues."

When one of the "second-tier" candidates attacked his opponents about their "liberal" positions, Rudy Giuliani's come-back was: "I think 'Rudy McRomney' wouldn't make a bad ticket. And I kind of like the order."

Even the moderators made use of humor to drive home their points. At one juncture, Chris Wallace—with a mischievous grin—said to a candidate who had skirted his question with a canned response, "I'll give you another 30 seconds to answer my question."  And that itself, of course, brought a chuckle from the audience all too aware of the typical politician tap dance.

Humor opens people's ears and hearts in most circumstances—whether they agree or disagree with your position on an issue. If you make them laugh, they'll be more likely to give your message a hearing.

1. A sense of humor helps us step back from the seriousness of a situation and put disagreements and difficulties into perspective. During Ronald Reagan's presidency, his humor did more to calm the minds of American citizens than a flood of official press releases. Case in point: the comment he made as he was wheeled into surgery after being shot by a would-be assassin. To the doctors about to perform surgery, he quipped: "I hope you're all Republicans."

2. Humor can be a powerful tension reliever, especially the kind of humor that brings a belly laugh. When people with potential conflicts are thrown into a situation together, the joking relationship that results often permits them to relax in an environment where everyone agrees not to take offense.

3. Another benefit of humor in communication is that it creates bonds. When two people allude to something with a knowing wink and smile, informing other listeners, "That's an old joke," they draw a circle around themselves. "We've been through the fire together," they're saying, "and we've shuffled something into a solution, or at least into perspective." If you can get your audience, no matter how big or small, to "wink" with you through some shared joke, it automatically builds camaraderie.

4. Self-deprecatory humor can even help us rise above feelings of inferiority. A popular notion says if we can laugh at ourselves before others do, we're well-adjusted people. A speaker once stood in front of an audience at a large industry gathering. He began his speech with, "My mother would laugh at the irony of this situation. A "C" chemistry student standing to address a roomful of Ph.D. chemists....  There has to be some justice in this." With such self-deprecating humor, we disarm our potential critics.

5. Even positive physical benefits can come from a belly laugh. Laughter can relieve headaches and lower blood pressure. It would be cheaper and quicker to laugh—or at least to listen to laughter—than to reach into the medicine cabinet. Think of the city council sessions, advertising pitches, and even family meetings that are so much better and more effective when a little humor enters the atmosphere. Humor can engage a skeptical board or an annoyed spouse and lighten their mental load just enough so that they can actually hear what you have to say.

No matter what situation you find yourself in—running for president, presenting to an executive committee, or persuading the homeowner's association to waive a code—humor can rock the boat enough to ease tension and engage hearts and minds in your message.

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